GUESS WHO'S BACK?!

It's been a while since dropped some entry here. Almost 9 months. i've been busy these past months. aside for my graduation, i also had my review on RCAP for my licensure board exam for nurses. not until on June 2008 where the examination has been scheduled. June 1&2 to be exact. It's definitely a long journey since i had my review, took the exam. && luckily passed the exam on July. a rollercoaster ride it may seems but that's how life is. I've got a realization this time && that has something to do w/ my status in life at this moment. as a living truth, i'm still a daughter who needs a wall to lean on. i'm talking about my parents. i'm kinda embarrass of what i am today. although there's a big plus being a registered nurse [a degree holder] but what's the use if i'm not gonna apply it in the real world. i don't know what taking me so long to find a job related to my field. well, it's my fault i guess. coz i'm doing nothing. i'm just waiting for a grace to shower upon me. isn't too foolish && idiot thing to do. probably, many people surrounding me think that i am disabled && worthless! coz i don't even give my fair share to my family in which i am already in the working stage! godamnit! i used to think that once i got passed the board exam i'm going to work as a nurse in a hospital just right after the deliberation. what the!!! what date is it today?!!! am i really wasting my time??!! hell, why do i'm asking this kind of question which all has an obvious answer! these really crazy!!! i have a lot of dreams && i don't want it to come any longer!!